Write It Out: Instruction Video
“There are stories the man recites quietly into the room which slip from level to level like a hawk. He wakes in the painted arbour that surrounds him with its spilling flowers, arms of great trees. He remembers picnics, a woman who kissed parts of his body that now are burned into the colour of aubergine.
I have spent weeks in the desert, forgetting to look at the moon, he says, as a married man may spend days never looking into the face of his wife. These are not sins of omission but signs of preoccupation.
His eyes lock onto the young woman’s face. If she moves her head, his stare will travel alongside her into the wall. She leans forward. How were you burned?
It is late afternoon. His hands play with a piece of sheet, the back of his fingers caressing it.
I fell burning into the desert.”
***
A Do-Over – MEC April 2020
1. I don’t want to bother you.
1. I don’t want this to end.
2. I don’t want to worry you.
2. I don’t want to forget what if feels like to have the whole day ahead of me, like a blank piece of paper waiting for my mark upon it.
3. I don’t want you to feel left out.
3. I don’t want to ever forget how fortunate I am to live in these times, with these advantages and opportunities.
4. I don’t want to be angry.
4. I don’t want to lose the connections I have with friends and family.
5. I don’t want to do this anymore.
5. I don’t want to take my good health for granted.
6. I don’t want to always second guess what it is I should be doing.
6. I don’t want to be unappreciative of you and of all you do.
7. I don’t want to live in fear.
7. I don’t want to ever stop dreaming.
8. I don’t want you to feel like we never have enough.
8. I don’t want to stop thinking of the future.
9. I don’t want to always have things all planned out.
9. I don’t want to start over with anyone else.
10. I don’t want to wait anymore.
10. I don’t want a new planet – let’s fix this one.
***
I saw a post today that read, “Only three more lockdowns until Christmas”. Sigh. I don’t know about you, but I don’t feel like buying anything anymore. Probably that’s a good thing.
We’re into the second year of this global pandemic, and patience is running thin. The game-changing vaccines are out, but it takes time to “jab” millions of people. Elected officials are trying to arrive at some sort of balance between population health and economic health. In the meantime, the virus is infecting more and more people as it changes, creating many different VoC’s or “variants of concern”.
I’m doing what I can. Staying in (mostly) and enjoying walks outside – especially now that the snow has been melting. There are many different types of birds at our birdfeeder these days; watching them is magic and never fails to give me hope. How are you feeling these days? Share your thoughts below!